I was finishing up the thank you notes for Lauren's birthday gifts yesterday when something made me a tiny bit sad and question myself.
Lauren got a lot of money for her birthday. When I was writing those thank you notes I originally wrote, "Thank you so much for the gift of money, I'm saving it for college!"
But will she go to college? Will people think I'm crazy for even hoping?
I ended up starting over and writing, "Thank you for the gift of money, I'm saving it for my future!"
It was the first time in a while that Down syndrome made me a little sad. I know college is not the end-all-be-all. It's not even necessary to be successful! So why did that tug on my heart so much?
And then this morning I read a news story about a little girl who's three years old that was pulled out of line by the TSA while flying and screened. I get that, I guess. Terrorists could be anywhere? (My feelings on this are a post for another day, believe me.) But then they tried to refuse to give her back her stuffed lamb, even after it too had been screened. I can only think she was singled out because she looked different.
Lauren and I are flying alone next month (YAY! So excited!). But now I'm starting to get a little nervous. Will a young (ha!) mother and daughter be pulled out of line because one of us looks a little different? Will we, too be singled out because we don't fit the mold of what a family "should" look like?
Another thing I'm mad about. Mad doesn't even describe it, actually. The situation with Russian adoptions is killing me. The Russian government is all up in arms because several Russian adoptees (now Americans, actually) have been killed while in the U.S. I understand their anger. But how in hell can they be so angry about how "their" children are treated here? Do you even know how some children are treated there? Children -babies, really- are starved, neglected, forgotten and hidden away by the government. Many just because they were born with too many chromosomes. They are transfered to adult mental institutions around their 4th birthday. Starved of human touch. Compassion. Love. Nobody cares if they have sweet dreams. If they're clean. If they ever learn to walk, much less get out of bed. They die from infected bed sores, starvation, lack of medical care. But now Russia is angry? It's okay if it's sanctioned by their government though? It's infuriating. Believe me, I agree with everyone in saying that one child killed is one child too many. But outlawing adoption to the U.S.? Trying to outlaw foreign adoption all together? It's disgusting and hypocrisy, at best.
Sorry for the depressing post, I'm in a mood I guess. Time to put on my big girl pants and cheer up. Lauren is unpacking her diaper bag as we speak!
I am lucky enough to be this girl's mama and today we will have fun.