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A blog about our busy family with two amazing kids, one of whom happens to have Down syndrome!

Sunday, February 14, 2016

It is well

Today at church we sang a song that I consider to be "my Lauren song".

1. When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, 
when sorrows like sea billows roll

whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, 
It is well, it is well with my soul. 
It is well with my soul, 
it is well, it is well with my soul. 

2. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come

let this blest assurance control, 
that Christ has regarded my helpless estate, 
and hath shed his own blood for my soul. 

3. My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought! 
My sin, not in part but the whole, 
is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, 

praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul! 

4. And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight, 
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll; 
the trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, 
even so, it is well with my soul.

My sorrow when Lauren was ill cannot be put into words. At the time, I felt truly forsaken. I felt abandoned by God when we found out she had Down syndrome. I felt utterly destroyed when we found out that she would be born with a broken heart. I was emotionally eviscerated when she was ill.

Lauren just turned four years old. Four years with our blessing in disguise. Lauren was our unanswered prayer. I prayed that God would not make us walk this road. I prayed that God would not make me parent a child like her. And instead, He gave me her.

People say that God will never give you more than you can handle. But it just isn't true. Lauren's illness broke me. I will never be the same person I was before she came into our lives. Lauren's illness was so much more than I could handle on my own. By the grace of God, I wasn't on my own. I had my husband, my sisters, my parents, my in-laws. Countless friends and acquaintances. Complete strangers that prayed for us daily. Most importantly, I had Him- the Great Physician, who healed both Lauren's heart and mine. He showed me a better way that is so much richer, so much happier and so much more real than I ever had before.

It is well with my soul.

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Ryan has been sick for a week. He keeps regularly going 24+ hours between throwing up, which is super weird to me. I kept him home from school again today because he threw up while still asleep last night. The kicker? I was sleeping in bed with him. Yeah. Ick. Good thing I love him so much. We could definitely use some prayers for him to feel better!

Getting them both dressed to take Lauren to school this morning was actually less challenging than I expected, though we did miss the chance for Lauren to walk to class with her friends. She did NOT like this and went and sat on her (empty) bus bench to wait for her friends. She was very happy to show me the way to her classroom though!

My mom offered to keep Ryan so I could nap since I was up all night with him. It was great, I dropped him off at her house, came home and got Lauren off the bus and then I napped while she napped. It was pure bliss. I haven't slept well at all since he first got sick last week! A midday nap was just what the doctor ordered.

While I was rocking Lauren to sleep before her nap she said, "Mom, want sing!" So I sang Rockabye Baby. In our house, this progresses to Rockabye Mommy, Daddy, Lauren and Martha (the cat). Today it ended in, by request from one almost-four-year-old, in Rockabye Hummus! I laughed through the whole song and then she was laughing too. She really, really loves hummus.

When she got home from school I emptied out her backpack and she had some artwork. One was a tooth-shaped paper because they've been learning about the dentist. The other was a paper cutout of a person that she drew eyes and a mouth on!!! It also had a band-aid on it and when I asked her what happened she said, "Band-aid!" She is one smart cookie.

Then I rocked her to sleep tonight and she kept snuggling her little face into my neck. Every once in a while she would give me the tiniest kisses on my neck. She is the sweetest girl ever.

My mom took her out to dinner and to gymnastics tonight so I could grocery shop alone. Ryan got to stay home for some father-son bonding time over video games.

My mom said Lauren did awesome at gymnastics! She usually does pretty well. She has an awesome teacher who is amazing with Lauren. Really, she goes above and beyond what I could expect out of a non-adaptive gymnastics class. Today they worked on the balance beam, which Lauren cannot/will not do. Her PT at school tries it but she doesn't feel steady enough. So today in gymnastics they were walking on the low balance beam and were supposed to jump over a little stuffed animal. Lauren can't do that either. So instead, she walked with one foot on the balance beam and one on the floor (super low balance beam!). When she got to the part where they were supposed to jump over the stuffed animal, Lauren picked it up and kissed it!