1. When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
when sorrows like sea billows roll;
whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.
It is well with my soul,
it is well, it is well with my soul.
2. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
let this blest assurance control,
that Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
and hath shed his own blood for my soul.
3. My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
4. And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
the trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
even so, it is well with my soul.
My sorrow when Lauren was ill cannot be put into words. At the time, I felt truly forsaken. I felt abandoned by God when we found out she had Down syndrome. I felt utterly destroyed when we found out that she would be born with a broken heart. I was emotionally eviscerated when she was ill.
Lauren just turned four years old. Four years with our blessing in disguise. Lauren was our unanswered prayer. I prayed that God would not make us walk this road. I prayed that God would not make me parent a child like her. And instead, He gave me her.
People say that God will never give you more than you can handle. But it just isn't true. Lauren's illness broke me. I will never be the same person I was before she came into our lives. Lauren's illness was so much more than I could handle on my own. By the grace of God, I wasn't on my own. I had my husband, my sisters, my parents, my in-laws. Countless friends and acquaintances. Complete strangers that prayed for us daily. Most importantly, I had Him- the Great Physician, who healed both Lauren's heart and mine. He showed me a better way that is so much richer, so much happier and so much more real than I ever had before.
It is well with my soul.