When we found out that Lauren would be born with Down syndrome I had some pretty nasty thoughts go through my mind. Most of them were driven by total fear of the unknown.
One of the big ones that stands out to me was that I felt so bad that I would be cheating Ryan out of a real sibling.
I was so wrong about that. It breaks my heart that I ever thought it would be the case. They enjoy (and don't enjoy) the full spectrum of sibling emotions. So many unexpected things have been popping up and it's been wonderful and truly eye opening for me.
Today the sweetest thing happened! At our Kroger they have carts with little cars up front so a kid can ride and "drive" it while the parents shop. It's Ryan's favorite thing ever. He always sits in it and steers and Lauren sits in the baby seat up front near us. Well, not today.
"Can Lauren sit with me?" I heard Ryan's little voice ask.
Be still my heart! I was so excited about that! So I went to buckle her in next to him and the seatbelt was broken! He had his heart set on the red car so I just pushed our cart a little slow. Everybody survived, haha.
He wanted her to sit with him! He did right away tell her, "I'll handle the driving." But he actually asked for her.
I'm so mad at myself that I expected her to be something less than a real sister. She loves him, reaches to kiss him, hugs him, steals his trains, and looks at him with complete adoration that is reserved especially for him. There's nothing like it in the world. I am so happy and so blessed to have these two amazing little people in my life. And although they don't realize it quite yet, they are even luckier to have each other.