Seeking our wonderful

     Today, I was brave. It's gorgeous outside again and supposed to rain later today and tomorrow...and cloudy all next week. So I wanted to take Lauren to the Kensington Nature Center trails. Problem is, it's not paved and it's not super wheelchair friendly (obviously, because it's middle of the woods). We've done it before, but I've needed another (stronger) adult to help me muscle her chair up hills and over roots. And Lauren has to be feeling super cooperative because she just absolutely has to get out and walk for parts of it. 

    Well, our day got started. We went to the grocery store and Lauren was having some difficulty making great choices (aka not being nice) so I was nervous to try the nature trail with her. So instead, we went to Maybury State Park since there's a paved trail. It was so much FUN! It was an excellent workout for me since it's pretty hilly and pushing a 95lb kid in an adaptive stroller up those hills is not easy. She got out and walked a couple times, too! We went to the park after and they had an accessible swing that's on a track, and as we were leaving she said, "That swing was just like a roller coaster!"

    It's a 4.7 mile trail, and Lauren was ready to play at the playground, so we only went about a mile in and turned around, making our trek just under 2 miles. My twin sister and our dad did the whole trail this winter and loved it, next time I have some kid-free time on a beautiful day I'll definitely go back. I'm trying to build a list for the summer of things I can do alone with Lauren (ie, not needing another adult) and get her more active and moving. Generally, we refer to Lauren as a two-adult kind of kid. She needs somebody for the heavy lifting and a spotter 😆 The local pool is a big maybe, depending on mood and behavior that day. I've had some fun (aka shit show) times trying to get Lauren out of our city's rec center pool WITH another adult! Any beach is a hard pass. The local park is a yes because if she's having a behavior moment it's safe and easy to wait her out. We've definitely added Maybury as another yes. The zoo is a maybe. The nature trail is a maybe. Walking our neighborhood is a yes. Bike rides now are generally a yes, but her bike is too small so that's becoming less fun for her. Walks are tricky because I want to get her more exercise, but if the wheelchair is available she wants to sit in it. But if we don't bring it and she can't do it, it's not like I can carry her home or to the car or whatever. Her low muscle tone (associated with Down syndrome) and her foot issues (from her congenital bone fusion and subsequent foot surgery) make walking distances physically hard for her. It's way easier to get her to walk when my older sister and niece are with us because the girls love to play. It's hard to find motivators for Lauren that aren't food, so I've been using things like "Mommy will play Barbies with you" or "we can read books together" when we're done.

    Honestly sometimes it's not necessarily that things are physically (for her) hard. Sometimes when behavior is particularly challenging it's just not worth it to leave the house. WOULD we have fun if we did x, y, or z? Maybe, but sometimes it's a disaster. Sometimes my chronic illness is a factor and I know I don't have the motivation or ability to get through an outing on a bad behavior day. So we'll take today as a win and start planning for more exciting days soon.

    So. Is it brave to take your 9 year old on a paved hike and to the park without a second adult? Generally, probably not. But for us (and lots of other special needs families) life looks a little different. My life motto has been that life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful, so we are just going to keep seeking our wonderful.