It happened again

I've been home for the last almost 2 weeks since my finger injury. Lauren's been up really early since the time change. She used to wake up and play in her bed or her bedroom. Lately she's taken to going downstairs to the main floor and playing Barbies. Totally fine! We've been so proud of her newfound independence and that she's getting around so well. When Greg left for work this morning she had arranged her favorite stuffed animals to watch her play with her Barbie camper and doll house.

When Ryan and I woke up about 30 minutes later, I went downstairs to get the day started. I see her Ba Lamby, Baby Lamby,  Lamby 2, Froggie, and Froggie in a little group, set up to watch the Barbies play. But Lauren wasn't in the family room. So I called for her, thinking she was hiding in the living room. Nope. Then I ran upstairs to see if maybe she was in her room because sometimes she gets herself dressed now. Nope! I yell for Ryan to wake up and tell him I think Lauren's not in the house. I'm yelling her name, checking everywhere. Then I noticed the front door is just barely open. Not even open, really. Just not all the way shut. 

I found her in her pajamas, with her shoes on the wrong feet, in the front yard. She told me she wanted to drive my car. (I'd left it unlocked, which could've been disastrous as it was in the 90's here today. Thankfully this was at 7:30am and it wasn't hot yet. Now I will make sure I'm fanatical about locking the car doors.) I yelled at her, I sat down on the ground and hugged her and I told her that she cannot leave the house without a grown up. That she could get hurt, lost, or be afraid. She looked back at me with a totally blank look, like she didn't even realize she was somewhere she shouldn't be.

We have talked about this with her over, and over, and over again. And then again some more. She can tell us that she won't leave the house. She can tell us that at the grocery store, she stays with mom. She can tell us, "I don't run away from mom and dad". Her elopement and impulse control has been leagues better since we started medication in the fall. This was our first elopement (from home) since we got Monte over a year ago. This morning she had let Monte outside in the back yard. I think he'd have alerted me if he was inside. 

This is the reality of parenting Lauren. Some days it's like she doesn't even have special needs. A lot of times I just feel like I've had a three year old for a really freaking long time. She speaks really well, we've always been fortunate that speech is a huge strength for her.  So I think sometimes we forget that speaking and understanding are not the same. She scared the crap out of us today. My husband is installing a video doorbell system with motion sensors on the front porch as we speak. It will alert both of our phones if there is motion on our front porch. We're on opposite shifts and somebody is almost always sleeping at our house, so having a tall interior lock doesn't really work, because there's nobody awake to open it when the other returns home from work. At our old house we had magnet alarms installed that would sound (loudly!) if a door opened. We can't currently do that either because of said opposite work schedules. I bought a hook and eye latch for the top of our door, and might just make myself wake up to let Greg in on weekends (on weekdays I'm up and gone before he gets home). I hate that this keeps happening.

Lauren is the most trusting child ever. She would go with anyone. Her life, her world, is unicorns and rainbows. I love that innocence about her, it's like an inner beauty that I wish I could at least half possess. But it makes her really hard to keep safe sometimes and it terrifies me. She calls me honey and sweetie and sweetheart as part of her regular way of addressing me. She still lets me rock her at bedtime every night while she peppers my face and neck with kisses and tells me she loves me. There's not a soul on this planet who loves and trusts like she does.

So now we get more vigilant. We talk about not going outside without a grownup a million more times. We install locks and security systems. And we hope it sinks in or that we can outsmart her, hopefully both.

Not fun update

Last week I had a hand injury and hand an open fracture (bone visible) to one of my fingers. And it's my dominant hand. I'm out of work for 3 weeks (or more, I follow up again with the hand surgeon next week). I'm in a ton of pain and I can't even really care for Lauren on my own. I can't pick her up, I can't ride my bike because I can't use the hand break well enough...so this pretty much sucks! Blog updates will likely be few and far between for a little while. Lauren's been taking some independent steps (yay!!!) but is far from independent. Luckily my parents and Greg's parents, and my sister are all helping!

Biking!

This bike is amazing!!!

We have been having so much fun. Ryan loves to get to be the driver. I love being able to take Lauren on bike rides again. We even took Monte with us and had him job alongside us, but that needs some practice. I'm going to practice doing this without Lauren a couple times so I can really work with Monte on heeling next to the bike.

We got Ryan a kids FitBit and he loves it! It's been really fun for him to see how many steps he gets. He get a lot! We challenged him with a sticker chart. If he meets his goal (8,000 steps) five out of 7 days of the week, we can get ice cream on Sunday. If he meets his weekly goal all month he can pick out a small Lego set. So far, incentivizing exercise is going well! Tuesday he wasn't going to meet his goal, so I suggested just walking to the corner and back since he was so close. Instead, we walked the block which is just over a mile!

Lauren's still not walking. She will take steps if she's holding onto furniture, going from one piece to another. Sometimes. She is now getting around her classroom pretty well by scooting and cruising on furniture. She's still pretty heavily limping, so that's kind of a bummer. We're getting there! I've been trying to get her to use her tricycle (with a push handle for me to steer/push) just to get her knee moving. She's doing pretty good with it! It's just taking a little longer than I expected. We leave for up north in less than a month and I am suuuuper hoping she's walking independently because the place we're going is not very accessible. Overall, things are going well and she's been super sweet and happy lately. If she's happy, I'm happy!

Great things ahead!

Lauren is doing awesome and is recovering so nicely! She is willing to take a few steps at a time, heavily supported by both hands held. She is not yet able to put all of her weight on her left foot, but she can stand unsupported for a few seconds!!! Over the weekend and today she wanted to ride her tricycle. We tried her newer pink tricycle and she was really unable to propel/steer independently. So we used the older red one with a handle for me to steer/push. She did amazing!!! She did the pedaling and even steered for most of it. I'm so proud of her.

That being said, this is the first year Lauren can't fit in my baby bike seat (though last year was shaky and unsteady if I'm honest). It has been one of our favorite spring/summer/fall traditions, to ride around while she talks to me, talks to neighbors, points out animals, colors, etc. In short, it's her happy place. I've been sad to have to end that stage of our lives. Until we ordered this bad boy! It should arrive next week and will have to be put together. The company suggests a bike shop put it together...but Greg's going to give it a try. The passenger weight limit is 135lb so we should be able to use it for many, many years. Lauren is so super excited and even picked out a new helmet so she would be prepared! Ryan is really working on learning to ride a two wheel bike this summer so hopefully family bike rides are in our near future!

Today I got her to agree to homework. Generally, we don't do homework. She doesn't have the attention span OR the desire to do it. That makes it nearly impossible to get done and definitely impossible to do without arguing. She did two pages tonight! She did the math, told me her answer, and I wrote the answer in highlighter. Then she traced over it with pencil. How amazing is this?! Yes, I suck at drawing frogs. LOL.

Also, today Greg told me Lauren got herself up the stairs, used the toilet in our bedroom independently, got herself back downstairs, and then got herself into the basement to play. This is huge!!! Not only physically, though I know she butt-scooted for all of it. But the fact that she was able to problem solve what she wanted, and was willing to do this independently was huge for her. We're really working on getting her to do things independently when she is capable of doing them. She really does just seem so much happier overall since her surgery.

Ryan went for another mile long walk with me tonight which makes it I think 3-4 times in the last week. He has a friend coming home with him from school tomorrow, so he is really excited about that. He has a Spring Fling at school later this week and in the past his anxiety has really prevented us from going/staying. This is the first year he's really excited about it!